Friday, November 25, 2011

Inspirational Humorous Quotes

Finding humorous life experiences can be a great way to lift your spirit and these quotes might be just the thing to do so. The following are some great humorous quotes: 

“An English teacher wrote the words, “Woman without her man is nothing” on the blackboard and asked the students to punctuate it so that it made sense.
The boys wrote: “Woman, without her man, is nothing.”
The girls wrote: “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”

“Two drunks are in a bar.
First one: "My wife is an angel"
Second one: "You’re lucky! Mine is still alive."

“Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% chance of getting it wrong.” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“If money won't make you happy, you won't like poverty either.” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“Anything preying on my mind would starve to death.” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "why the long face?" Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“Don't take life too seriously, You're not getting out alive.” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“Judge: “Well, sir, I have reviewed this case and I have decided to give your wife $700 a week.”
Husband: “That’s fair, your Honour. I’ll try to send her a few bucks myself.” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?

“Doctor: “Did you take my advice about your insomnia and count before going to sleep?”
Patient: “Yes, I got as far as 28,658 and then it was time to get up.” Knock Knock… Who’s Joking?”

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